Every day when I get stressed (and every day I do get stressed), I do two things. First, I take a Tylenol. Second, I start hearing the voice of Wayne Coyne in my mind (no, I'm not crazy) singing Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots part 1. The line, "Oh Yoshimi, they don't believe me/ But you won't let those robots eat me" is oddly soothing in the middle of my day. This fantastic song about evil pink robots making war on mankind reassures me. No matter how tough my day gets, I'm not going to be defeated.Or maybe I am, but if so, the fight is worth fighting.
Psalm of the Day
"How long, LORD? Will you utterly forget me? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I carry sorrow in my soul, grief in my heart day after day? How long will my enemy triumph over me? Look upon me, answer me, LORD, my God! Give light to my eyes lest I sleep in death, Lest my enemy say, "I have prevailed," lest my foes rejoice at my downfall. I trust in your faithfulness. Grant my heart joy in your help, That I may sing of the LORD, "How good our God has been to me!" Psalm 13
Certain siblings and I, actually it may just run in our entire family, have always been very suspicious of people who are always happy. I don't mean joyful or smiling. I mean full on June Cleaver nothing-has-ever-been-or-ever-will-be-wrong-in-the-world-it-has-never-rained-the-sun-has-always-shone-care-bears-sesame-street-tele-tubbies-buckets-of-ice-cream-happy-happy-happy-fun-times people. To these people I often quote the wisdom of the Dread Pirate Roberts, "Life is pain. Anyone who says otherwise is selling you something." I think that David would agree with me. This morning I read this Psalm where David was feeling overwhelmed by the struggles of life, but he ended with praising God because he had faith in the Lord's goodness. I also read a quote from Edith Stein saying, "Do you want to be totally united to the Crucified? If you are serious about this, you will be present, by the power of His Cross, at every front, at every place of sorrow, bringing to those who suffer, healing and salvation.” Serving God is not comfortable, but it is good. It is good because it brings us exactly where we need to be: on our knees and resting on the strength of God.
In other news, I was informed by a patron of my local coffee establishment that the world is ending. That's right, the signs have come about, the stars have aligned, the messages have been made evident here on earth that the apocalypse is upon us and the world is over. Hell fire and brimstone! I was astonished by this news. Maybe you won't agree with me in my opinion that the world has been ending (end times) for quite a while now, but I think that you can all join in my skepticism of yet another claim that the anti-christ is here and the world is about to explode. No, its not even skepticism about that. Its more of a fatigue of theories on the end of the world resulting in closeted discussions and paranoia. Granted, with the middle east being in the situation that it is, the world actually might explode, but that's not what he was talking about. My question though, for this person and for myself, is if we really believe that the world is ending why are we only standing around discussing the details among ourselves and not going out to make sure that the world is ready for it? This question has made me come to two conclusions. Either we don't really believe what we say we believe, which would result in action, or we don't really love the way we say that we love, which would also result in action. Either possibility is frightening. Does anyone really believe anything anymore? Do I really believe anything anymore? If I believe something it should be evident in the things that I do. Thoughts are not enough. Belief also takes action. I think that for a long time I haven't believed anything other than the current song on my ipod, the movie on the television, or the latest Braves game. I've been awfully comfortable and it is hard to really believe anything when you are comfortable. Maybe its student teaching (which has made me very uncomfortable) and the fact that my faith has finally been put back into practice, but I think that finally I am beginning to believe again. I'm understanding the need to put actions behind my words and thoughts. I would like to say that I am completely 100% happy with this, but I'm not. I hate it. I feel pain everyday for the lostness of the world and of my students. A very large part of me wants to go back to my couch where I can write papers at the last minute, drink coffee for energy that I won't use, and read about people I don't care about. I've realized though, that I can't do that. I care about my students and the people around me. God has placed me on the front lines for the next couple of months of student teaching at least and I am overwhelmed by it, but I am on my knees and it is good.